The differences

I love these two girls. 

I am learning to appreciate the differences between my two girls one is 3.5 yrs and the other 2 yrs they are both lovely and different. I am praying to God for discernment so that I can be able to harness their potential as two different individuals. I want to ensure that I do not fall into the trap of comparing them and neither do I want to set standards based on one of them or others. While discipline remains to be on equal grounds, I want to ensure that I take recognition of their different personalities for better results  or so I imagine.....

I have been trying to think of how different they are and this comes to mind.

Kendi(3.5Yrs)-Our Sugar 

She loves to swim, she can literary be a fish, she can stay in a pool the whole day! She swims in the Ocean as well and will even take risks in such waters

She loves music and can sing forever and will learn a song within a few days and sing the whole lot of it. She will play her toy guitar and key board and never tire of doing so. She will come up with songs that are only known to her and sing for a while

She is full of energy – never say die kind of battery and  likes to go everywhere.

She will cry, when someone cries, she is very empathetic and compassionate

When she wakes up, she goes right into activity and she just wants to work on project after project
On cereals - she is good to go with weetabix-full stop, loves milk, had to stop her from taking too much

She likes kind of sour stuff, like lemons and the like; she will do well with sweet potatoes and arrow roots  

Tana( 2 years) Our Spice

I like to call her Madam CEO (Chief Executive Officer).

She will sleep in her floater in the pool, enjoy for some time and then say-enough of that  and wants to do something else

She appears innocent from the face – but beneath that face is a tough girl

She seems to love books all the more and will read my books and I don’t think she gets anything out of them, but will sit and flip through the pages

She is not likely to cry when you are crying; she is more likely to give you a face that says, okay it was bad but please -get over it!

When she wakes up, she wants to take her time; an extra 30 more minute in bed having some me-time and will then call out later to be picked. Don’t dare wake her up in a rush..
On cereals  - she loves, cornflakes, rice crispies, fruit n" fiber and all the goodies that come with them, she kind of likes the variety. Her milk, must be sweet-at least some Milo in it.

She loves the sweet stuff, she loves cakes and ice-cream and can eat whole lot of it if allowed to.

God please help me to realize and appreciate the differences in these two beauties and give me what it takes to bring them up in the way of the Lord. I hope we are leaning to appreciate our kids as they are.

I like it

I have nothing much to say about this photo...i just like it. Breastfeeding Mum, with a Monkey checking  her out and her two daughters watching in awe! 

I am here-part 2

So am I healed yet from the smell issue? No. But I have learnt to look more for the blessings instead. I went for the scan three weeks ago and it showed nothing. The doc said, there is nothing they can do. Initially I had joined a Google group of people who have this condition-some sort of an internet group therapy. They have this because they say people who have some form of distorted smell tend to get depressed and I actually thought I was headed there. So I joined it for weeks and I realized this was not my portion as a child of God in the first place and so I unsubscribed from the group.

It’s been tough, I can’t tell when my baby has poop, I can’t tell when gas is leaking, perfumes smell strange, i can’t tell when the food is burning or is rotten. Most things smell very bad, but some smell and taste good, at least things are much better now than when I was pregnant. I used to call my boy a Nazarite, because when I was pregnant, I could not take anything that had a preservative or food coloring, it had to be whole and fresh from the garden.

I remember sometime back, a friend visiting me, I had just bathed my baby and she went like, oh! Your baby smells fresh. I smiled back and said nothing because I had no idea of how my baby smells. Today I am grateful, despite all the things I cannot smell and the ones that smell awful, I can see my baby, I can touch my baby, i can kiss those gorgeous cheeks, I can take walks with my family, I can , I can I can , I can do a million things. I may have to keep checking to see if my baby has poo-poo, but all the same I am glad to be here with my family. I have left it all to God i am trusting Him for healing but all in all I know He is with me. I am looking out for blessings – they are more than I can count. 

So when i have that one issue that is driving me up the wall, i have learnt to remember millions of blessings in  my life and in all things, praise Him!

To date i have learnt not to take anything for granted, even when something tastes  and smells good, because occasionally i bumped into things that taste good-though my taste is odd ( it may not be what you are tasting)... i thank God....for it takes nothing short of His power for every part of our body to function. 

I am here

Last year, just when I realized I was pregnant with our boy (whom we like to call our last born), I also developed a smelling condition that initially caused a complete loss of smell and later became a distorted sense of smell, medics call it parosmia or anosmia, which ever the case, all I can tell you is that this condition can be quite depressing. My first trimester was a nightmare, coupled with all the other challenges of pregnancy; this smell thing was driving me crazy. 

So I decided to get some medical attention. I was advised to take a C-T scan. The doc gave me my prescription and I rushed to the Hospital where this could be done. Just before the technician who was to perform the scan pressed the button to start the scan, he asked me, could you by any chance be pregnant? I said, yes I am. Then he went on to ask, why did your doctor ask you to do a C-T scan? And I am looking at him like-what’s the issue here, I am just one suffering pregnant woman. Anyway, he explained how C-T scans are not done to expectant mothers, something that the doctor had completely overlooked and neither was I even thinking about it, I was so engrossed with my situation all I needed was the quickest medicine possible.

I was so sad that my problem could not be diagnosed and I had to wait till nine months were over, but most of all, I was so grateful to God for showing up just at the right time- who knows what could have happened to my precious boy. In the midst of my turmoil – God showed up in a small way to declare that I AM HERE! I always look for traces of God in life especially when I am going through a tough time, He has a way of reminding us- I am on the throne. At that time, it was through saving my boy from any harm that could have been caused by the C-T scan.

So Mums-Look out for God, He is everywhere; it is just a matter of perception. 

The guilt trips

One of the things that I have been thinking about during this Easter has been of the many times I have been on guilt trips as a mother. You know those things that we as mothers do and blame ourselves most of the time even when we had completely no much control over them. And even when we could have done better, we remain in condemnation for years and we just don’t get to forgiving ourselves.

Well it hat happened to me with my second born, I had to go back to work a month after I gave birth and she therefore never breastfed as much I thought she could. I expressed breast milk for three months and since she was feed on the same using a bottle, she started preferring the bottle than my breast. Within four months all she wanted was milk but in a bottle. As you all know-my milk disappeared and that was it. So I decided to take a ride, which we all know. It’s called a guilt trip. I thought may be I should have quit my job in the first place, I started feeling so bad that I was a working mum and I felt that I had failed my girl so badly. I talked to the doctor about it and he was very consoling, he told me not to worry, four months on breast milk was a good job. But you know, I also sang that song to many of my friends and I can tell you my husband though very understanding must have been going nutty because of my whining about it. One day, I took the whole issue to the Lord in prayer, I told him that I felt like I have failed and that I don’t think I made a good decision. It was simple-the Lord pressed it upon my heart to forgive myself and move on. And that was it, I learnt how to forgive myself for some of what I would call silly mistakes and the serious one’s too. And I know many of us Mums take these trips a lot, I would just like to encourage us to take it to the Lord and not live under condemnation. Trust you me, even when no one understands what you may be going through, even when it looks petty in their eyes, the Lord does...always remember it is for FREEDOM that Christ died for us. Hope you had a great Easter

And my girl is awesome and growing – lovely girl!

Happy Easter-Eggs, Bunnies or Christ

When I think of Easter, My heart leaps with Joy. When I think about the savior who died for me and that the power that raised Christ from the dead is at work within me. Christ’s death and resurrection gives me hope to live a victorious life, a life of triumph knowing that Christ died and now I am free.  It is a good reminder of the authority bestowed unto us as children of God. His death and resurrection most of all gives me hope beyond the grave.

Now tell me, what are we telling our children about Easter? Is it all about vacations, shopping, easter eggs and bunnies (this is a foreign concept in Africa but it is easily getting it’s way in- all we know is that eggs are to be eaten! Full stop)? Is it like Phew!- I am not working today! Am not saying that we should not do all these things, actually I am headed to Malindi for some days off with my lovely family and a couple of other great friends. But most of all, I want my children to remember Easter, not for the vacations, eggs and bunnies- but for the awesome redemption work of the cross. I am still trying to figure out how to do that apart from sharing bible story before bed time, just to bring it to their level, any ideas?

Thank you for the cross Lord

Thank you for the price you paid,

Bearing all my sin and shame, in love you came and gave amazing grace.

I love to love you Lord.

Mums Choices

One of my favorite books is “Make peace with anyone”, by David J. Lieberman. In one of those paragraphs the author talks of when you have to make a decision in life, any decision there is always a combination of three underlying motives.

You can choose what feels good

You can choose what makes you look good

You can choose to do what is good and right

The first two motivations chip away at our self- esteem, while the third makes us feel good about ourselves and who we are. So when you make a choice to do what is right, you feel good about yourself. This is because to feel good you must do good, not what feels good or looks good. Only when you are able to choose responsibly are you in charge of your life and do you gain self-respect. So what determines the choices that you are making as a mum?

My conclusion - the Word of God is a sure foundation. Choose to do what is good and right in the light of God’s word. 

Outnumbered

The last time we tried to take a family photo, it proved impossible. Then it dawn on us...Ooops, we have been outnumbered! It is three verses two. All the kids were in their own moods. Two of them yelling at the top of their voices and the photo above is the best we have so far. We plan to take another one soon and hopefully this time, things will be a bit better. This one was on self timer, so we had a few minutes to organize ourselves, so now we shall ensure we go the professional way or at least get someone to take us one. All in this journey of motherhood. 

Keep doing good.

Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time, we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Ephesians 6:9

Becoming a better mum.

I thought by the time I was giving birth to my first born, she was going to be raised by one awesome, perfect, loving mother. Little did I know that through her, I was going to come to terms with my own weaknesses as a person. I have more than ever before realized how I need Jesus to help me raise my kids. They are wonderful, but through them I have come to terms with the weaknesses of a choleric personality that highly dominates my life and more so now that all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God.  However, all I can say is that I have not yet made it but surely the Lord has been faithful in using them to work on my patience and anger and many other areas. I must say I am a better person now and motherhood has worked on my character the works!

My husband sometime tells me, I can’t believe you handled that issue that way. You have changed – he means I have changed for the better. Hallelujah! With time I have learn that the hardest battle to win are those within than those on the outside and trust you me, I am a better Mum than I was three years ago, I think my what we like to call the last born is in better hands that my first born, I have been worked on by the Lord, some lessons have been painful as I come to terms with my sinful nature. However, I have learnt secret to becoming a better Mum is submitting yourself to God and to the leading of His Holy spirit. I just love the Lord! 

Somehow funny

Someone told me that those people who laugh their way through challenges are more likely to make it in life than those who deal with life and themselves so harshly. So last night our boy woke up to feed around 12:30am, he is doing pretty good, he wakes up thrice or twice every night for a three months, I praise the Lord.

Anyway, last night after I fed him around 12:30am I received a call from a friend of mine who was going through some challenges. After putting my phone down, I realized my hubby was still sitting on the bed. I asked him, “Honey are you okay”? He says “Please hand over the baby I take him to his room (yes our boy is out of our room). I said “Honey, I gave you the baby, where is the baby? Immediately we start looking for him on our bed...to be honest, I literally peeped under the bed (lights were all off). Then I said something like “Honey I gave you the baby” My Hubby goes like “ Yeh...you did, I think I have placed him back”...my last words were , please go check if the baby is there. Did he go to confirm.......I’m not sure but at least Mnara was (thank God!) there in the morning!

Sounds funny, but sometimes, I think the whole break feeding process at night takes place when my hubby and I are half asleep.

This morning we laughed about it and once again I thank God for the gift of motherhood and a husband who is willing to pick the baby and bring him to me to breastfeed regardless of how many times he wakes up at night.

A season for everything.

When i have visitors, sometimes i have to ask them to find some space to sit. Yes, you need to locate one because sometimes my house looks like a play school of some sort, toys everywhere, dolls, books and snacks on the seat and the like and somethings are just upside down. The beauty of it is that i am okay with the way it looks because i know it is just  for a season, i do not want to go nutty trying to tidy up all the time and yellling at my kids every-time they throw a pile of toys on the carpet. I once read a book by Joyce Meyer and she was narrating how she regrets having to be all clean and tidy when her four kids were growing up. If she were to do it again, she says she would  allow her kids just to be kids. So tell me Mums, how is it for you? Are you going crazy trying to keep things in order in your house? Do you need to do so?

 This is the view you get from the door sometimes. 

You would think some hurricane passed by.

Look at my puffs, my children like rolling them around the house.The baby gym at the corner sometimes became a field for jumping.  The only thing i must mention  though  is that as much as they do this, the same little hands pick every single item and return them where they belongs even if it takes 30minutes to do so. Teaching responsibility is a must. We have a song that we sing that as we tidy up

"Every body tidy up

Tidy up x3

Every body tidy up-Just like mummy"

You  have to make tidying up fun too. 

Peaceful week

Do not be anxious about anything, in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, make your request  to God. And the peace of God which transcends all understanding will guard your heart and your mind in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7

Have a peaceful week

Dedication

Today (Sunday), we are dedicating our son Mnara to the Lord in church, in the the presence of many witnesses to affirm that we are committed to raising him up in the ways of the Lord. This will take place during the church  family service but beyond this public confession and undertaking, we have taken time as parents to dedicate him to the Lord. We have done this with all the children as soon as they are born (not in the delivery room tho......mostly at home when Mum and child are released form Hospital!). My husband and I allocate time to specifically take hold of the child and pray over them, their lives and we dedicate them to the Lord as we praise Him for giving them to us. When led to do so, we anoint them with oil as a symbol that they belong to God and no other. We consider this an act of worship and acknowledgement that these children are a gift from God and we are just but stewards entrusted with the divine mandate of raising them up as a godly offspring for His Kingdom and purpose. So we are all looking  forward to the formal dedication of Mnara in church this morning, not to fulfill a religious responsibility/ obligation but to publicly say our vows and commitment to this undertaking  of godly parenting and confirm what we already believe in.
I pray you have a blessed day. Remember that God is not a God of Sunday but a God of Mon, Tue, Wed, Thurs, Fri and Sat and any other day you may have in your week! We praise Him!

Graduation of a kind.

My househelp is graduating today from a child minders class. She has been so faithful in attending all the classes which have been taking place on Saturday afternoon for the last six weeks. She was very excited about graduating too. So i bought her a congratulations card and gave her a gift to encourage her and to let her know that this is not the end in life and that God has great plans in her life. As Mums, we need to encourage our househelps as much as we can. I imagine none of them ever went to school with the intention of becoming a househelp, am not sure they love their jobs but I imagine they need them anyway, so can we try to make their lives at least more bearable as much as we can. It’s always easy to say how hard it is to get along with them, but do we ever imagine how hard it is for other people to get along with us! Or are we the perfect ones? I doubt.  This is not to say that I have not had tough times with househelps-oh I have, which Mum has not? You may need to buy me coffee, then we can have a one-on-one as I share lessons learnt in this field of househelps, but trust you me I am much better that when I first began! 

Salute!

Had breakfast this morning at Java Adams with awesome Mums. They were all on time for breakfast - absolutely amazing at 7am! I  salute these Mums and a Mum to be. Zippy is the Mum to be, Kate is Mum to an awesome boy-Leone(9 months), Gladwell is a great Mum to Hope(3 Months), Sly is a sweet Mum to Samara ( 15 months) and Rosemary a great Mum to AJ ( 4 Months). This are lovely ladies who are dedicated to their kids and families and i like their zeal for life and motherhood. It was refreshing to have breakfast with them, to share a few things and encourage each other as we go through this journey of motherhood.

They will all agree with me that we also salute our hubbies as well for taking care of the babies while we were enjoying some great breakfast at Java. Thanks for choosing to take care of the babies and giving us some time to just breath. We need it just o keep sane you know. I think when Mums are happy, families are happy too. I would  encourage other hubbies to give sometime to their wives as well to just breath. Its Naturally refreshing. I am looking forward to a great Saturday with my family i hope you are too! 

Cast it on stone!

What is your vision as a wife and or a mum? I have discovered that without one whatever you do might seem right, wherever you go might seem okay after any road can take you to nowhere. I think it is good to make a conscious decision on how you want to live your life as great results must be planned for including how you want to see your children and or your family, 5, 10, 15 years from now. Write down your vision, look at it regularly, revise it as much as you can and most of all seek the Lord about it. So do you have one?

They are a gift!

Let’s take time to enjoy the gift of motherhood. Let’s remember we are but stewards. Lets make God proud as we ask Him for wisdom to raise our children. They are but a gift, they belong to the Lord and only in Him can we raise them to be the Children He desired them to be. You wish they came with a Manual? Never! It is demanded of you to constantly talk to Him who gave them to you so that He can speak to you about their lives and in so doing you harness their God given purpose. This weekend, take time to Thank God for choosing you and giving you the children you have and ask Him to give you wisdom to raise them. He desires a godly generation. 

Blogging 101

I had planned to start this blog last year ( April 2010) i began and i hit a dead end. Then some wonderful friend assisted me to learn the Basics of blogging again and i am so thankful to Candace for taking her time to build my capacity on the basics of  blogging, i would cal it blogging 101. Let me say Uishi Milele Candace. It's one year but the vision of the Real Mums still holds on and today it has been revived! 

Today is my Favorite day

My daughter - Tehillah, loves to sing a song that goes like this

"Today is my favorite day, God  has made it a special day, 

I love tomorrow and yesterday but today is my favorite day"

This song always brings me back to sanity. It  captures the mood of the moment and reminds me of the need to enjoy each day. Indeed, lets  make each day our favorite day. For it is the day that the Lord has made, God has placed a lot of value in it and so should we. Let us not allow days to just pass us by. 

Can we quit?

Can we all quit being Super Women and allow God to work through us. We struggle so much instead of allowing God's grace to flow in our lives. I have learnt with time that God takes care of us and our families. He is the God of our Children as well and no matter what He remains Faithful.