The calls...

The other day Kendi goes for a longcall and she suddenly yells – Po-op come out!!!!!!  The rest of us at the living room burst out laughing- she must have been having constipation!

Still on this topic- my girls are funny. They are always competing on who poops' the biggest and the most! And either the Dad or I have to be the referee. They always shout – Mum/ dad, I have poopd’ a BIG one! Come and see…! before we even get there, the either sister  has already arrived at the site to witness if what she can see is bigger than her previous download...yikes!

I ask Kendi to go and pee, and she replies  – "Mum I am okay- pee is still sleeping". Meaning she is not ready to go for a short call. Alah!

Thankful for

We are thankful today for life.

We are thankful for knowing the author of life. He knits everything together! His name be praised forever and ever!

"You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in your book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed. How precious are your thoughts about me, O God. They cannot be numbered! I can’t even count them; they outnumber the grains of sand! And when I wake up, you are still with me! Psalms 139: 16-18

Positive reinforcement

Since the opening of schools, our sweet Tana has not been very warm with her teachers. At some point we did not know what to do, but we know that she takes time to warm up to people. I tend to think she is melancholic- though I guess it is still very early for us to conclude that. They say melancholics' take time to develop friends ships, but once they have you for a friend..You are lucky because they are super loyal! Well, she takes that kind of character sometimes.

So for some time, we took this behavior with the teacher as being stubborn, because it came on and off depending on the side of bed she woke up from (moods). So at some point we told her that if she continues to do so, she would start receiving spanks. The girl did not change at all.

I am sure some of you must be thinking- are the teachers good? Yes they are. They are wonderful, knowing them at a personal level, they bless our lives and those of our children. I would not fault them, they worked extra hard to warm up to Tana, and they were not understanding why Tana is so not warming up to them, at some point i cousld see them wondering why she is so different from Kendi. Yes she is, they are all different, speacial and unique in their own ways.

Eventually, we decided to change strategy. The stickers came in handy and a lot of encouragement. We told her how the teachers love her and they are working very hard to be her friend, and any day she would hug them, it turned the whole house to a celebration mood. The girl has suddenly changed, she adores her teachers.

Recently, Kendi and Tana plucked flowers in our compound, carried them gently in the car, all the way to school to give their teachers. Honesty, I could see the tears in the eyes of their teachers’, just the appreciation from two little girls, who in small ways are saying – we love you teachers and we appreciate you.

What I have learnt is that we need to be sensitive to our children and when one way does not work let is try out another to reach out to them, they are not a homogenous group and our heavenly  father has a way of helping  us know just how to go about this. 

How could she?

I am always of the opinion that if I get myself in a situation that eventually gets messy – I ask myself “What could I have done better?’.

I like to choose the path of being responsible and appreciating that if a situation did not turn out right,  I also contributed to a great extent, if not fair of contribution. If I can make amends – I pursue peace.

I have observed keenly, especially with my children; In case I question Kendi on anything - she will be quick to say-“its Tana this or that” and if I question Tana- She is always quick to say- “its Kendi this or that”.

I have realized that owning up to our responsibilities is one of the key issues that people like to dodge. Like Adam we like to say “it is the woman you gave me”….meaning had God not created Eve, Adam would not have sinned. What if Adam said –God, I failed as a leader. I am sorry, I did not follow instructions…..well, I am not sure how the rest of the story would have been.

But mine this Mums Monday is to challenge us to own up to our responsibilities and teach our children the same. We must always be willing to admit that we contribute to life situations either positively or negatively.  

I am of the opinion that selfishness highly contributes to pride and hence the question – How could he or How could she? By the time we are asking such a question, what we are inevitably saying is that – I stand right, I stand righteous while the other persons is to be judged and condemned.

I am challenging myself this week to own up to my responsibilities -please join me Mums and lets teach our children the same.

When we teach them, one day this might be said of them;

“Then the other administrators and high officers began searching for some fault in the way he was handling government affairs, but they couldn't find anything to criticize or condemn. He was faithful, always responsible, and completely trustworthy”

That’s was Daniels version of who He was – what's yours and what are your children becoming?

Dad will give you Piriton

So the other day Kendi noticed a scratch on my face, it’s actually a mark that that I acquired when I was a child. I fell on a hot jiko, that is the version according to my Mum.

Kendi was so sympathetic and inquired so much about the small mark.

She then told me “I am so sorry Mum, Dad will give you Piriton"

******************** 

The other day I asked Tana to give me a push to the door, I was leaving the house headed to the office

She literary placed her hands on my back and pushed me out. 

Talk of literal understanding of the word push!

God bless these girls- they just make my day!

A few milestones

We are thankful to JEHOVAH! Can you feel a sigh of relief in that sentence...

....Ethan is now sleeping the entire night from 8pm – 6am, we feed him with some milk at 6am and he sleeps again till 8am plus, this is the point that we declare, there are no babies in our home, just a bunch of young ones. 

He is crawling and moving very fast, he is confidently standing up all by himself , he is engaging in quite a number of activities with the girls. 

They make the castles using blocks and He destroys them, the girls are always screaming "Noooo! Nooooo! Ethan Stop-Mum Help" and he gets a few kicks from Tana once in a while. 

He has four teeth. He is very strong – Kendi cannot even get a pen out of his hand. “She says, "Ethan you are so strong , Mum please help, Ethan has taken my pen”

Hey-I am Ethan Mnara, just incase you forgot.

Hanging on and walking round 

Sliding with the girls

Crawling to the slide

He likes sitting on these ropes at Amani ya juu and watching other kids jump over!

We thank God for all these milestones, we do not take any of them for granted. When we see this, we stand in awe and say- How great thou art, oh Lord our God!

It has also been crazy around here, a lot of work, the last leg of the year can be overwhelming for me in particular. We have been busy but we thank God for His grace. Always amazing! 

WE LOVE YOU LORD! HOW EXCELLENT AND MAJESTIC ARE YOUR WORKS!

Opportunities

I honestly think it takes a lot sacrifice for working Mums and I have been wondering of late what opportunities are there for us to make use of to bond more with our children.

I have observed for a while a few children waiting for school busses in the morning with the house helps but in some cases the parents are sleeping – which I find a bit disheartening and this made me think further.

Granted after a day in the office- sometimes I am so tired I sleep like a log and I could even slip out of my bed in the morning without even having to make it much coz I wake up in the same position that I slept in.

But you know I think we need to sacrifice a little more because God has given us children to take care of. They are His- we are just but stewards and within no time they will be out of our homes and we must therefore make most of every opportunity to spend time with them even if it means freezing at 5:30am outside with them as they wait to catch up on their bus.

So I have a few suggestions on opportunities that we can use and I hope you can add a few more, let me be clear here that I am not taking  working mum on guilt trip but. These are opportunities depending on your availability

a)      Can we try and bath our children, it s great bonding time- this is when I get to hear all the “I love you Mum” and the hugs from Naked kids. The kids just love it and you get to know where is hurting, you see all the bruises and the like.

b)      Can we try to have dinner together – you get to hear all about the day and those disciplinary issues of table manners can be settled here. It is a good negotiation place.

c)       Can we try to keep our weekends as less busy as possible – spend quality time with the children, play, laugh cook, clean up the car, go for a walk and the like

d)      Can we try to dress them up for school? It is very sad that some parents never get to see their children in the morning and I understand because of Jams you may need to leave early, but if possible, can we dress them up and see them off.  This might mean waking up at 4am but it is a worthy sacrifice

e)      Can we cut down on church activities – this may sound pagan but some of us spend the entire week in the office and then the entire weekend in church related activities. My husband and I have gone on a break on Church activities. When we did our survey on the best disciplined teenagers’ in church, we realized that their parents took time off from activities to take care of their children in their formative years. I remember one of the senior ladies telling us that she would never even attend a bible study when her children were young.  

She now has bunch of God fearing young adults who are serving in church today and she is serving as a church deacon too. She says there is time for everything. So young Mums do not be deceived when you see senior ladies as church leaders and think you need to grab one of those positions now.  A WISE WOMAN UNDERSTANDS HER SEASONS IN LIFE! UNDERSTAND YOURS!

f)       Can you attend functions with them- if you must be out on a Saturday and Sunday and if the function can accommodate the children, carry them with you. Why leave them at home? I know it is work to have a bunch of kids all over you everywhere you go? But they are yours for heaven sake! So get on with it. Carry food, a rod and discipline and get it moving. They get to experience your world too. When I get invites over the weekend, my first response usually goes like this “ I hope you don’t mind , but  I will be come with my three kids too”.

g)      Don’t try to please the boss by staying in the office after 5pm – unless you are honestly working and you must. Get going home.  My advice on this, is make use of your day in the office, avoid chatting aimlessly and idling, spending all your time of facebook and the like- meet your targets so that you can confidently leave at 5pm or whatever time working hours end knowing that you have accomplished your daily work.  If it means working over lunch hour work. Because you need to balance home and office. You must emerge the best in the office and you must take care of your family to the best of your ability (children).  

How else can we make use of our opportunities? Let’s share.

Something to do

We made pizza on Saturday. And the kids (girls) love and love and love to help. So I figured out how to make them help Mum in making the pizza.

I cut out all the vegetables /pieces that needed to be on the pizza and they get to arrange them. They had so much fun doing that. And I am sure they are looking forward to more. 

They get distracted by small things

They did a good job!

I need to seriously engage them in cooking-but in a safe manner. 

This I give thee

If there is one thing I would like my children to say of me, is we followed Mum as she followed Christ. You know, that is a profound truth. The book of Act talks of Christ as the Author of life and I want my children growing up in full knowledge of the Author of life! In Him is their beginning and their end, Him as the alpha and the Omega.

Only in Christ can they find hope in this world

Only in Christ can they achieve all their dreams and live to their very last potential

In Christ they are safe; they have a pillar of strength in all seasons of life.

In Christ they find answers to all mysteries of life

In Christ, they have a foundation that is secure

Only in Christ can they live, move and have their being.

So I pray that they will know the power of prayer, the power of His resurrection, what His death on the cross means to them

The joy of waiting in Christ, to bring to fulfillment all the great things He has in store for them

The goodness in just knowing him as Lord and savior.

Mums let pray for our children, let pray that they will get to know the Jesus we know and not just know him democratically but personally! I love Him!

This Mamas' visit to Turkana

Please note that these photos are just random. They remind me of so much and I pray that they will help us think of how we all can help in small ways. If you think you can be of no use, please read the book of Esther and think again. 

When we arrived, all the children gathered around us.

And the entire crowd kept following. Look at their homes.

There was something about this girl that I just liked. She carried her brother the whole time we were there and never got tired. Did i say - it was super dry hot?!

This is how you check in at the airport. 

The airstrip- that carrier is used to offload bags off the plane. 

Their homes, there was a very sick man sleeping if you look closely. Yes, health care is not as available  as you would think. 

This is where they gather, church, school and social hall. They seat on those benches.

 

This was just another wonderful girl. She was moving so fast-I could barely keep up with her.

This lady was showing us what they eat-poisonous dry fruits. You eat more than one and your body cannot take it.Yet we found so many children feeding on them.

These are street children in Kitale. Look at the girls, they are so vulnerable. They are hosted by an organization during the day, that feeds them and then releases them at 3pm to go back and sleep in the streets. They are families that run away from Turkana in search for food. Can you imagine your daughter sleeping in the streets. The sexual vulnerability. What amazed me is that all they need is love. They want to hug everybody and hang on you. Love sums it all!

 

This is one of the volunteers- they adore her!

Thankful for

Our Children, they are back to school and have settled in very well. Prior to that they were sick and we saw Gods' hand in it all, they had a bad flu that came along with mouth sores. When your chidlren get to  feed on water using a spoon, that's not good at all. We bless God for the healing.

Caroline, joined Mount Kenya University and she is very happy and working hard. lets pray that God continues to provide all that is required for her to finish her university education. 

Its been busy around here, but Gods' been great-givign me grace and strength for each an every day.

Taking yoghurt

I was packing snacks for my kids and I was wondering what they are going to use to take yoghurt in school, because they tend to lose the normal spoons. Then I bumped into these small spoons that are used for medication. They hang around the house for those times when I need to give them medicine. So I decided to use them and they were quite good and I knew I am safe because they could fit into the snack box and my kids would enjoy using them. Needless to say that I do not have to lose my cutlery to the school because the kids loose them more often than not.

 So there you go. Keep them, they might save you on a yoghurt day. Furthermore, keep them in the car, you might need to have a bite of something and they come in handy.

Question????????

Today on Totos Tuesday, I am wondering - What determines how many children we want to have?

Why are women giving birth in IDPs camps in Turkana to too many children while they still cannot feed the ones they have? 

They say for any woman there is always a minus one, and it does not matter how many you have. Like there is this one child who needs to be born in your family and if you don't give birth to them, some other woman will because they had to be born. Meaning there are some women walking around with your children who you did not want to give birth to. When I heard of this theory - I was puzzled to say the least. 

 I will soon share my thoughts in this subject but what do you my friends think? What are the influencing factors when it comes to how many children to have?

Does God get to say something about it? Or is He the silent listener to your conversation with your spouse on this subject, or is He is watching in silence as you work through the short term and permanent  family planing methods while you have the last say?


Are children a faith project or a facts project or a combination of the two or none of the said?

Is multiplication equal to re-placement? Where you have two kids to replace yourself and your spouse while God says we multiply?  

I think the views are extreme, but let me hope I will hear something from you? Click on the comments below and lets hear what you have to say. 

Up and about.

Hi all, I have been up and about. I went to Turkana for some work related misssion. I am still coming to terms with what I saw. I have not even had the strength look at the photos that I took. I will share soon when I gather the courage.  

I am still thinking about the poverty that I have seen in a few days

The mothers who have no meals for days but still have to nurse their young ones.

The teenage girls who have to sit on soil for days - because that is what they have to do when they are having their monthly periods

The naked children, people sick with HIV and AIDS, they have the drugs but cannot take them because they have no food to go with the drugs. 

and while I am thinking that I am about to recover-Many are killed by blast as they collected fuel from leaking pipeline in Nairobi's densely packed Sinai area.

Okay don't you all think we need a solution in Africa.

I am part of that solution - are you?

How manuy of us are saying - Yes Lord - here I am use me. And i mean, this must be a geneuine heart position not necessarily what it appears on the outside, not to offer some make up-but to address the core issues, and I mean genuinely.

Okay. I will be back! 

Food in the car.

We recently had a small accident. We hit a car- near a parklands-just outside Jubilee Christian Church (JCC).  For one moment I thought what a Holy accident.

The guy we hit was fair enough so we decided to agree on terms and all was sorted out. We ended up as fairly good friends and my hubby and him exchanged  cards, he asked us to open accounts with KCB, (Kenya Commercial Bank), that is where he works and of course my hubby asked him to consider him as his architect the next time he doing some sort of construction. I did not say much, because if I did, I would have given him my card and said- “next time your wife thinks your violating her rights- ask her to call me”-and for sure which man wants to hear that.

Anyway, the issue is here was the fact that we were smack in the middle of an accident with hungry kids whom we were rushing to have lunch and then sleep. What a MESS! We were now going to be stuck in that scenario for next a minimum of two hours.

I remembered my friend Candace and how at one point I realized she carries lots of food in her car, especially when she going for some sort of a few hours journey. I once asked her, why all these food? She told me, they have been stuck in Jams with hungry kids and its pathetic!  I wonder why I did not learn than lesson right there! So this was my time and the lesson sank home. Lucky enough my hubby had hidden some potato crisps in the car and there were two lolly pops too. So guess what, the kids ate? Mnara had a good time with a lolly pop. I just needed to keep their sugar levels up because they were getting cranky.

We managed and after a few hours, we bought them some fries and they literally inhaled them and when we got home they slept.

Lesson learnt- food in the car, in whichever form, can save you from hungry cranky kids.  So I intend to have some canned fish and some more food always in the car, you never know when you may need it!

Have a wise Wednesday!

Healthy Snack

Last term I visited the kids in school during their snack break, I found my pretty girl Kendi armed with a bun, a banana and a cup of tea. This is what they take most of the time for the kids whose snacks are already paid for and hence offered by the school. I had always thought it was a good idea because it safe guards the days I get to travel and the hassle of packing snacks in the morning. But not when I saw Kendi take that tea and a bun. Not that they are bad, but I knew for sure I can do better.  I felt so bad because I realized that Kendi was not enjoying variety and I could see the envy she had for what the other kids had carried, the sandwiches, the eggs, the muffins, the sausages and the like, and the joy that comes from opening their snack box and bragging about what their mums had packed for them. 

So I have  decided this term to be making healthy snacks for my kids to carry to school.Its time for Mum to pull up her socks! Doesn't matter if I have to put them in the fridge for a few days. I started with these for the week. Apple whole wheat muffins!They are irresistible. Easy to make and bake. You could try them for your kids too, and guess what, I used whole wheat bread flour! Pure niceness-healthy stuff and more coming! Kendi and Tana....You are in for a good snacky ride!

 Apple whole wheat Muffins. So whole until they kinda crack...mmmmmmhhh!

They were so so good, and they have cinnamon...my goodness!My hubby ate one and gave me a few kisses ha!

Should i resign from work?

I have had many Mums talk about how guilty they feel when they are going back to work after maternity leave. I have been there too, so I know that how feels.

I have heard of Mums who have left their jobs for awhile so that they can take care of kids when they are young. I haven’t done that, though there are times when such thoughts have crossed my mind.

I know they are mothers who are convinced that full time motherhood is what every mother has been called to. I can’t answer that because I do not have that conviction yet, but neither can I say that those who feel so are wrong because God speaks to us as individuals. He is not a democratic God and does not work with majority.

I have also heard of mothers who can’t wait to go back to work, in fact the three months maternity leave at home with the baby can be quite overwhelming for them. Well, that I must say puzzles me a bit. But I cannot judge them either.

I have also heard of Women who have no interest whatsoever in Children, they get married and they are supper content. Well, great, that forms a marriage. Children don’t form a marriage. So I have no problem.

I am not here to give answers to these complex questions because I am of the opinion that they differ and that they are personal depending on what God has planned for your life.

I am very content has as working Mum; I continue to experience a lot of grace and Peace as I work and as I take care of my children and family, I have with time and through Gods’ grace learnt the art of balancing, I am not quite there yet, but I can be chairing a meeting in the board room at 4:50pm, and be changing messy diapers at 5:10pm, cooking and loving my hubby and the like. And I have found such great assurance in God that makes me know for sure that I am supposed to be doing what I am doing today. God has placed a huge burden for Africa in my heart and my family and my work are part and parcel of this vision that I carry every day.

So if a mum were to ask me, if they should resign from their work and take care of their children. I would ask them, what is God saying about it? Because if God says it, that settles it!

What I have realized in the world of motherhood is that, it is a very opinionated world. And most of us mothers, I include, have all sorts of opinion about everything. Granted, we must all learn from each other and that that is why I have this blog in the first place, to share my experiences, but remember my life is not yours and yours is not mine, you can try the principles, pick out the lessons but you must always remember that you are a master piece, unique and none like any other in the whole globe. 

Find your assurance in Christ.

I am not doing something

Okay, truly my kids sometimes amuse me.

Picture this.

Tana pours some food on the carpet and does not take the initiative to pick up the pieces.

she knows very well, Mum will not be amused but she goes hiding.

So when Mum appears at the sitting room, and honestly not knowing what has happened and for another reason calls out for Tana

This is the answer she gets 

Tana : Mum, I did not do something.

and who said you did something or anything for that matter?

I guess the guilty are always ashamed, its a statement that works well with the kids.
******************************

Mum sends Kendi to get for her some tissue to blow her nose,  the conversation goes something like this;

Mum: Kendi get me some tissue

Kendi  gives a good stare at Mum, eye ball to eye ball and says;

"Mum,you need to say , Kendi get me some tissue PLEASE..."

Okay, I know we have been teaching them, the need to say Please, Sorry and Thank you...but who is the parent here! ha!

So Mum apologizes and says

"Kendi kindly get me some tissue please"

The girl runs for the tissue.

So don't preach water and take wine...they are more keen than you think. Set standards that you are willing to keep. 

School holiday

When my hubby and I decided that we would have a Minimum of three kids- mark the word Minimum, one of my greatest fears of having the three that we now have - all close together was the whole issue of School Holidays.

I was not sure how that would go with house-helps, I stressed my self over it for weeks looking for the most appropriate and workable solution. Do I need to hire two helps over the holiday? Would one be able to take care of the kids? Would my leave application be grated during holidays so that I can spend time with the children?

I mean I battled  with this over and over again, and we all know when we start getting frustrated on an issue it is an sign that we are now starting to operate in the flesh, for God never authors frustration and/or confusion.

So I am thankful today because, the past August Holiday, was the first holiday with three kids under four in the house. It was nothing but PURE GRACE.

I am so thankful to God for seeing us through the holidays, with all the good times and the challenges that came with it too.

It has been more than I would have ever thought, AWESOME and once again I am reminded that it is not mine to worry about the future, God does take care of the details. 

Today, I thank God, from the very bottom of my heart, for His faithfulness, for being my pillar, my strength and taking care of the school holidays and replacing all my fears with His immeasurable GRACE.